(142) The ONLY Time Self-Care Makes a Difference(true self-love)

Updated: Sep 8, 2019

3 Ways to Raise Your Quality of Life

Oh, that poor guy, still bumping and tripping his way through a dark garage, instead of buying a new light bulb.

And her! Even though she likes to shop, she just put off buying those much-needed pants—again.

And them! They just cannot not get around to having that annoying (possibly dangerous) noise in the car looked at right away.

So what?

Well, you might be right if that was all, but these people also put off eating, at times, as well as urinating, and they end up without enough sleep too.


Because whatever they are doing is more important than they are, more important than their needs.

Just today, I was out biking and felt cold. I had a jacket with me and told myself that I would stop at the next light and put it on.

The next light was green (and yes, I kept going).

Every time we put off one of our needs, we experience a negative emotion(s): the same emotion we feel when someone else puts us off or deny us (if you are not sure you have these feelings, begin watching your reactions when you tell yourself: *Not now; *Not Yet; *A little later ; or *No).

For a long time, I ignored those feelings, but ignored or not, they still shaded a good day or further darkened a dim one.

Self-Care Numbered

How would you rate the quality of life for those people? Personally, I would give us a four out of ten; but that number goes up a bit more each time we take better care of ourselves.

Like those amazing people who never run out of milk for their morning coffee, who feed themselves when they are first hungry, and who immediately take that tiny, irritating rock out of their shoe.

They also give themselves enough sleep, as well as head for the toilet when they first feel the need.

Their quality of life? Having looked up from the bottom of my four for so long, I would have to give them a 10—at least.

Better Self-Care (self-love) Starts with--

To up life’s quality, choose one way to take better care of you.

Sounds easy, right? The problem is that most of us encounter some inner-resistance. So, with that resistance in mind, here are the three tips:

1. Know that the reasons we give ourselves for postponing and denying always sound logical and compelling. And they are almost never true.

2. Know that giving yourself what you need, when you need it is not selfish. In fact, making yourself more of a priority can make it easier to give to those around you (and raise their lives too).

3. And most of all, relax. I didn't.

I decided (with a set jaw and steely eyes) to start feeding myself at the first sign of hunger.

When the next meal rolled around, I was busy and just wanted to finish up—something. I decided to stop and eat anyway, but came up with yet another reason for waiting (just a little bit longer).

And I realized that the struggle was putting tension in my body. Eventually, I also realized that it was easier to take care of myself if I stopped struggling.

Relax when making the decision to change. Do it quietly, gently (without the steely eyes and set jaw).

Also relax before taking action (by breathing out the tension with each breath). Once relaxed, it can be easier to take the next step.

Best Ever

One of the most amazing feelings we can experience is that of someone caring about us, caring for us. It is a feeling that surrounds, supports and lifts; it makes life better no matter what else is happening.

And it is a feeling that you can experience more of—from you. So, do that. Go on a campaign to give yourself what you need when you need it, because you deserve (a lot more?) of that feeling.


Keep All of Your Resolutions

(the easy way)

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Permanent Resolutions Without the Struggle

Here is more on following your heart:


From Psychology Today, here are 17 Ways to Take Better Care of Yourself.


The very foundation of personal improvement is self-care/self-love. Here is that link: https://www.danielsperaw.com/blog/the-essence-of-personal-improvement

Emotional Release is easy if you stop saying I'm Fine and know this trick: https://www.danielsperaw.com/single-post/The-Worlds-Biggest-Lie-Im-Fine-an-easy-way-to-tell-the-truth

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