Raising Your Level of Happiness
* Happiness, as used here, is day-to-day experience (rather than the emotion). Raise your level and life becomes better, easier.
Oh, The Reality
That poor guy. He is still bumping and tripping his way through the garage, instead of buying a new light bulb.
And her! She enjoys shopping but just put off buying those much-needed pants—again.
And that annoying (possibly dangerous) noise in the car? So many in this group just cannot get around to having it looked at right away.
Well, you might be right if that was all, but many of them put off eating, at times, as well as urinating, and they end up without enough sleep too.
Why? Because whatever they are doing is more important than they are.
Just today, I was out biking and felt cold. I had a jacket with me and told myself that I would stop and put it on at the next light. The next light was green!
The result of ignoring our needs? Negative emotions: the same ones we feel when someone else puts us off or deny us.
For a long time, I ignored these feelings, but ignored or not, they still shaded a good day or further darkened a dim one.
Note: if you are not sure you have these feelings, begin watching your own reactions when you tell yourself:
A little longer
So, how would you rate the level of happiness for these people?
Personally, I would have to give us a four out of ten, because every time we put ourselves off, we are momentarily making ourselves unhappy. Too many times too close together and our general level of happiness drops a bit further.
Ah, but each time we take better care of ourselves, we are momentarily making ourselves happier. String a few of these together, and our general level rises.
A highest score of 10 goes to those people who never run out of milk for their morning coffee, immediately take that tiny, irritating rock out of their shoe and always feed themselves when they are first hungry.
A Better Life?
The obvious step to raising our level is to choose one way and then act to take better care of ourselves, but when we try, many of us encounter some inner-resistance.
With that resistance in mind, here is one way to a lighter, happier life.
1. Know that the reasons we give ourselves for Just a bit longer always sound logical, even compelling.
And they are almost never true.
2. Let go
At one point in my life, I decided (with a set jaw and steely eyes) to start feeding myself at the first sign of hunger.
When the next meal rolled around, I was busy and just wanted to finish up—something. I decided to stop and eat anyway, but came up with yet another reason for putting myself off (just a little bit longer).
As I pushed myself to eat, I realized that there was tension in my body--? struggling against myself?
There is an easier way.
When making a resolution to change, let go of the steely eyes and set jaw; instead, make it quietly, softly.
Then, whenever you feel an inner-resistance to taking action, relax first, then act.
One way to relax: take a deep breath, and when you let it go, release the tension in your body; release more tension with each out-breath that follows.
3. Know that giving yourself what you need, when you need it, does not have to be selfish. In fact, making yourself more of a priority can raise your level and make it easier to give to those around you (raising their levels).
Now, For Both Secrets
And they must be secrets, because so many of us in this group behave as if we have never heard nor even thought of them.
One of the most amazing feelings we can ever experience is that of someone caring about us, caring for us, like a mother with her beloved child.
It is a feeling that surrounds, supports and lifts; it makes life better no matter what else is happening.
And it is a feeling that you can experience more of—from you. So, do that. Go on a campaign to give yourself what you need when you need it.
It might be best to work with one issue at a time but make this your goal:
experience more of that miraculous feeling
The first secret was about raising your happiness level a bit at a time.
The second one is about making a big jump. The foundation for such a jump? An insight.
She was saying, “If only I could find the right guy, I would give myself to him, and—”
I stopped her and asked, “Give your SELF?”
Her eyes widened, as she realized what she had said and what she had been doing.
Insight: her first step
He had been working so hard to succeed and was now desperate, his business deep in the red.
I asked him: “If there was one person on the planet holding you back, who would it be?”
He immediately said, “My Mother.”
She was giving him money to keep his business afloat. She had also given him the down payment for his house and had just taken over making the payments.
Now he knew: untangle from Mom; become independent; succeed.
Her & Him?
Both were stressed (over 'still not having'), and although their anguish was not physical, it felt that way. Even if that stress had been much smaller, still, it would have been pulling on their happiness.
What about you? Are you distressed over wanting more out of a relationship or the need for a relationship that lasts? Or is it about your career or passion?
Money? Is usually about something else: the fear of not having enough, the need to do more for loved ones or the need to fulfill a dream (like buying a home).
Whatever it is, you deserve a higher level of happiness -- even if a change does not seem possible.
And the first, vital step is an eye-widening insight, so you can begin to move on.
You can now focus a session on discovering your insight—at no cost.
Why? After a long period of solitude, I am back and giving full sessions free of charge (usually $100).
* This is my way of giving back for the gifts of that solitude.
* (And a faster way to step back into the world).
Yes, an Intuitive Counselor is a psychic who supports positive change right now. My purpose is to guide you to that eye-widening moment (the one that can make all the difference).
Give yourself this gift
Sessions are on Skype
(audio only, if you prefer)
A session? It is...
* Intuitive questions to reach that eye-widening moment
* Intuitive support to make a positive change
* And steps to release what might block you
Plenty of Time: We will stop when the session is complete (usually 40 to 70 minutes)
And continued support:
* I will answer your after-session questions on our special Facebook page
* And continue to send you life-lifting ideas each week
(a quick look at my bio is below)
You made it! And now...
Whether you make an appointment today or not, enjoy
Both are free (with no spam or address sharing, ever)
“The Top 10 Ways to (Instantly) Make Life Better”
You will also receive the entertaining, weekly series
“Unusual? Ways to Lift Your Life”
I began this in-ward journey on Feb. 10, 1971
Over the decades, I have
* Guided individuals and workshops
* Written 6 books, plus 1 for young adults & 2 for children
* Written a nationally syndicated newspaper column
* Hosted a radio talk show on creating positive change
* And you can find me on Twitter and YouTube (@DanielSperaw )